Too much for one person to handle...

I was supposed to be headed off to bed tonight but I find myself unable to talk myself into laying down just yet.  I'm gonna be human for a minute and just lay out tonight's struggle here for everyone to see.  I struggle with the "fairness" of things.  I struggle with why it seems like some people have more than their share of hurts, struggles, and pain in life.  I know God loves us all the same - I know He does and yet, in my human-ness I don't always "feel" loved the same.  I really struggle with feeling this way and feel guilty for even going there.  Right now I'm ready to pack this blog up and toss it in the trash can because I feel ashamed of myself.  I don't think that's the lesson though.  The Bible tells me - God works all things for the good of those who love Him.  In the midst of this suffering I think I just am unable to see the good through the tears - through the heartache - through the pain.  Just because I am unable to feel it or see it - doesn't make it so.  That's the lesson, I think.  For me anyway - just because I don't see it doesn't mean it's true.  What is true is God loves us and no matter what we struggle with - we are never alone - He is right there with us even if He doesn't take our struggle away immediately, provide us with a miracle, or relieve the suffering for whatever reason.  He is there.